Sadness

Sadness does not always manifest itself as a state of deep despair. Sometimes it's simply a silent guest in my soul. Most days you would not find tears on my cheeks; but if you could see my heart, you would discover tiny fractures in the muscular tissue of the organ that pumps blood through my veins and keeps me alive. On those days the sadness is as much a part of me as my laughter, or my love. I don't think I could extract it or eradicate it. And although the burden of sadness can frequently overwhelm me, maybe there's a quiet and fierce beauty in its presence. Maybe sadness makes me human, and in that sense, it makes me whole.

Finding You

Finding yourself isn't about not knowing who you are -- you already know exactly who you are.  No, finding yourself is about teaching yourself to believe something contrary to what you've been taught. We are taught to be afraid. To be guarded. To give up. We are taught that we aren't worthy, or beautiful, or loved. But these notions are all lies. Finding yourself isn't about being lost to who you are as a person -- it's about reaching out past the lies to the truth that's buried in your soul, and holding on to that truth with everything that's in you.

And although the journey of finding yourself is often a solo adventure, you will need friends to encourage you along the way -- to remind you that you are fierce when you feel small, to show you your inner brilliance when the sadness hides it from you. You deserve an incredible life. Find the energy to push back the sadness and give the proverbial middle finger to all the things that tell you to give up. Fight for yourself -- for your life. You only get one. One brief moment on this broad spectrum of time. In sadness, or happiness, in fulfillment, or longing -- this is it. Embrace it, with all it's possibilities and tragedies. And while tonight you may feel sadness, I hope you also feel hope -- hope for this journey, this journey of finding you.

Free Spirits

Somehow the world would have us think that normal is what we should be. And if we aren’t normal, then that should be our goal. But perhaps your inability to feel like you truly belong is the tool that drives you forward – to seek after the dreams in your heart, as elusive as they appear to be at times.

We complicate so many things unnecessarily. Following your heart is perhaps the riskiest venture you’ll ever undertake because your mind wants to tell you otherwise – to talk you out of the crazy ideas and notions your heart is telling you. The mind is the logic, but the heart is the dreamer in all of us.

And though you may feel like a dreamer stuck in a world barraging you with the message that you must conform to normality, remember that free spirits don’t conform. Free spirits have always and will always make their own path. People are afraid to change – afraid of change. But you – you are the game changer. You are the one meant to seek new adventures and experiences. To keep moving forward. To grow. To challenge yourself and others. And you do that by being different. By being bold. By being you.

It’s ok to dream. 

It’s ok to believe in love, and to fight for it. 

It’s ok to feel restless, because perhaps that restlessness is your heart trying to move your feet down a path you wouldn’t have otherwise gone down if you were content and comfortable and safe. 

Embrace the free spirit that you are. Embrace your wildness. Embrace yourself, and be free.
 

Facing Tomorrow

We are all flawed, imperfect, broken creatures.
You worry that your honesty about your struggles will scare someone away – that removing your mask and exposing your vulnerabilities and the things that aren’t so pretty or shiny will be too much for someone to hear, or to bear.
Hard subjects are frightening to those who refuse to be open.
Some people will be your friend for a lifetime.
Others, for a moment. 
And some will leave, and you will always wonder why.
But you can't doubt yourself.
You can't beat yourself up.
You can’t hide yourself away or struggle alone.
Community is found in vulnerability.
Writing, speaking, and sharing your story helps you heal and brings hope to those who are struggling just like you are. 
Just as the sun sets each day, it rises – and with it, comes hope.
And sometimes hope is all you need to face another tomorrow.

Firefly

You thought you were so put together, and yet so easily you come undone. You have good days and bad days. Some days, you have more bad than good. But spring will come. Summer will come. You will feel warmth again. Night will fade, and you will stand in the sun. Light will return, illuminating your veins. You just have to love yourself until it does. You have to love yourself in the night. I know that when you see your reflection, you don’t recognize yourself. But that’s okay. Because I still see you. And you are brighter than you realize. Even when your deep sadness and your exquisite pain paint shadows on your already worn face, the world sees something different. I see something different. I see how you glow and glow, more intimately and more intensely as you bare your soul and clench your teeth and hold on for dear life. I see spirit. And beauty. And grit. I see a firefly, both hesitant and radiant.